Sometimes the building blocks of writing are a bit mislaid.
Tag Archives: limerick
cARtOONSDAY: “wRITER’S bLOCK”
Sometimes the building blocks of writing are a bit mislaid.
Filed under 2015, cartoon by author, CarToonsday
Monday morning writing joke: “Face down”
There once was a writer from town /
who met every blank sheet with a frown. /
That it is why it is said /
he never went to bed /
and slept on his couch face down.
Filed under 2015, Monday morning writing joke, poetry by author
Monday morning writing joke: “Big stink”
There once was a writer from Spokane /
who did his best output in the can. /
Flushed with success, /
he created such a mess /
and ruined his one and only fan.
[Editor’s note: writing joke in the form of a limerick. It might not be the last one as April is Poetry Month. You have been warned.]
Filed under 2015, Monday morning writing joke, poetry by author
Monday morning writing joke: “Blockage”
There once was a writer from Minsk /
who wrote once, but couldn’t write since /
Writers block, he would say, /
chipped his confidence away /
or so that was his pretense.
Filed under Monday morning writing joke, poetry by author
Sunday Limerick: “Banned in Spokane”
There once was a man from Spokane /
who dated a woman named Diane. /
What they did they all say /
would take your breath away /
and still to this day has been banned.
Filed under poetry by author
Limerick: “$catology”
There once was a woman in scatology /
who proceeded to take a class in tautology./
“$h!t, $h!t, $h!t,” she said./
She said shaking her head./
She passed the final test without apology.
Filed under poetry by author
The midnight swim of Grace
Recently, in my hometown of Knoxville, TN, a 23-year-old woman by the name of Evelyn Grace Radford, supposedly fortified by wine and fit of limb and wind, swam not the English Channel, but the more modest Fort Loudoun Lake (sometimes referred to as Fort Loudoun Embayment. Named for an Englishman of noble lineage who never saw it and probably cared not a whit about it).
To add daring to her do, she did so in the dark of night and in no more than her bra and panties. If you do not believe me, you can read the article below or follow the link for the full story, assuming you are not stopped by some pay wall. She successfully swam the Lake, Embayment (sometimes also called the Tennessee River because this were the River starts), but was greeted by police and rescue squad personnel who had been called to the scene for fear that she had fallen in and might be drowning.
The event inspired the following modest poetic verse:
There once was a lady named Grace /
Who did the breast stroke all out-of-place. /
She swam the river with flair /
Scantily in her underwear. /
Alas, the newspaper showed only her face.
Grace’s mug shot
KNOXVILLE — A 23-year-old Knoxville woman told police late Monday night she “just wanted to swim” after making her way across Fort Loudoun Lake wearing only a bra and panties.
Evelyn Grace Radford’s near-midnight jump into the water at Volunteer Landing, however, prompted calls of a drowning to authorities who launched boats to rescue the scantily clad woman.
Her actions also prompted charges of disorderly conduct and public intoxication, records show.
Authorities were alerted at 11:54 p.m. that an intoxicated woman had stripped down to her basic clothing and jumped into the water and was swimming to the south shore, according to Knoxville Police Department Sgt. Scott Coffey.
“She left her clothing with her boyfriend at Volunteer Landing and he abruptly left the area,” Coffey said. “The witnesses indicated they believed the couple were in an argument prior to her jumping in the water.”
For the rest of the story: http://www.knoxnews.com/news/watchful-eye/midnight-swim-nets-charges-against-scantily-clad-woman_69968857
Filed under poetry by author, true story
Limerick: “Lear-ing”
Lear-ing
There once was a man named Lear /
who wrote in verse to make it clear /
that no matter what you say /
if you say it the right way /
even the sincere can come out with a leer.
[Editor’s note: This limerick is in honor of National Limerick Day, which was actually May 12th and Edward Lear, the 19th century English poet, author, illustrator known for popularizing the limerick form of poetry.]
Edward Lear, 1812 – 1888
Filed under poetry by author
Monday morning writing joke: “Too ugly to be seen.”
There once was a man so mean /
his face was too ugly to be seen. /
He was banned from sight /
so as not to give fright — /
except for the night called Halloween.
The man and his amulet.
Filed under Monday morning writing joke, poetry by author
Monday (morning) writing joke: “Stuck”
There once was writer of plays /
who could not get his character his way. /
“Oh, no,” they said. /
He shook his head in dread /
and he’s stuck in Act I to this day.
Filed under Monday morning writing joke
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