Tag Archives: Friday

Photo finish Friday: “O’ 13: perverse verse”

Unlucky 13

Unlucky 13

O’ triskaidekaphobia —
don’t let it annoy ya —
your paranoia,
your frightened mind.

This triskaidekaphobia,
it will destroy ya,
I do implore ya,
your fear it will find.

Yes, triskaidekaphobia,
it will toy with ya,
and even enjoy with ya
superstition sublime.

Said triskaidekaphobia,
“I don’t want to bore ya,
but I’ll take Peoria,
at twelve Central time.”

Came triskaidekaphobia,
by way of Astoria
thirteen more than ya
hoped you could confine.

But triskaidekaphobia
was unlucky ya know ya
and took the thirteenth floor ya
and then fell to its decline.

Of triskaidekaphobia,
I’ll say no more to ya
because history will show to ya
that it will all intertwine.

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Photo finish Friday: “Eye candy”

She was pumped to see the candy.

She was pumped to see the candy.

She was pumped to see the candy. And she was pumped to see the pumps. She had been looking all over town for this type of candy: handmade, locally produced, just the thing to impress him with. After all, he had always given her handmade gifts. Then she saw the shoes, the pumps made from chocolate and candy. She’d always heard that the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach, and she had a secret fetish of wanting a man to at least once in her life nibble and suck her toes. This was just the item. It combined both things, and he wouldn’t even have to know about her fetish until the moment he nibbled his way up to her ruby red painted toes.

Oh, could this be real? Could this actually be happening?

She wanted to click her heels like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz and say, “This place is better than home. This place is better than home.”

Then the witch behind the counter yelled over at her: “I ain’t here for my health. You gonna buy or you gonna slobber?”

She thought about it for a moment and wondered what she would do if he wouldn’t nibble away her chocolate shoe? What if he didn’t even like chocolate? What would she do then?

“Well?” the witch was not pleased to be kept waiting.

“I’ll take them all,” she said, “And could you gift wrap them?”

The look on the witch’s face was beyond sour. “You know, you can’t really wear these. And you can’t bring ’em back.”

“For what I have in mind, that won’t be an issue.”

The witch shrugged and packed up all five shoes.

She young woman walked home in the cold and blowing snow. Her man would be arriving soon, so she hurried. When she got home, she left a note where here man would find it, then went straight to bed and waited … and waited … and waited….

When morning came, she awoke with a jolt. It took a moment or two before she realized what had happened. All the chocolate shoes were gone, except one, which was partially eaten, the toe area missing. She found a wrapped present in the bed beside her and a note which read:

“My dear Virginia, how you have grown. I almost didn’t recognize you. I hope you like the present. I made it especially for you. Thank you for the chocolate snacks. I tried each one on your pretty little feet and nibbled my way up to your toes. Maybe next year, we can try these. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. –S.”

Virginia ripped open the present. She stared at the gift for a few minutes before she realized what it was. She turned as red as S’s suit to think he thought of her this way.

It was almost amazing what could happen when you still believed in the jolly ol’ elf.

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Friday”

If Friday were my /

lover, I’d stroke her evening /

and steady her night.

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Photo finish Friday: “Molar, molar”

A neighborhood child asked to pose for a photo before going to his first day of first grade, decided to “Jaws” the camera as his mother, in vain, attempted to capture his good side. But, wait, maybe she did.

by DAVID E. BOOKER

Molar, molar
will destroy ya.
Eat your toys
I will annoy ya.
Molar, molar
I’m your boy, yo
Cast you about
to and fro, yo.
Molar, molar
where’d you go? Oh
I ate a fat crow
and now you know, oh
little’s bros a go
for eattin’ so slow, oh.
Molar, molar
will destroy ya.

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Photo Finish Friday: “One for the Ages”

She looked at the invitation and thought about joining. Even if the name was wrong, it was okay. She could be “Laura,” like Laura in the Little House on Prairie books she read. Yes, she could be Laura. And if she was going to be Laura, the free travel bag would be a help. Maybe then she could travel more, though she didn’t like to travel much. She thought about it some more. It cost $16 to join. Money was tight. She didn’t have a regular job and was on a fixed budget, but sometimes she could get help. All she had to do was ask. But there was only one really big problem she saw with accepting AARP’s offer to join — she was only ten years old. And even she waited and waited and replied at the last minute, just before the September 11th deadline, she still would only be ten years old. Maybe next year, when she was a little older, she could join the American Association of Retired Persons. After all, she was already retired — at least for the summer.

Maybe next year she could join.

Maybe next year she could join.

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Photo Finish Friday: “No Exit”

This way be madness...

This way be madness…


John Sartre moved to town, running away from an existential crisis. he did not know what he wanted to do. He had tried his hand at art, play writing, film writing, essays, history, and philosophy. He felt he had succeeded at any of those. Then he came across the street sign and saw it as an omen, a talisman, a message — he would move in here and become a poet and he would not leave until he had succeeded. To date, no one has read the poems of John Sartre, and every time he sees the sign he sighs and wishes he were a sign maker. Then he could make sign to paste over this one and he could escape. Maybe then, there would be an outlet for his creative spirit.

[Editor’s note: now it is your turn. Take this image as inspiration and writing something funny, serious, sensible, or silly. Let inspiration be your guide and whimsy your muse.]

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Photo finish Friday: “The torch is passed”

The "safe" Olympic flame

The “safe” Olympic flame

With concern over security growing and the cost of the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia mounting, the Olympic Committee has taken the unprecedented step and decreed that the Olympic torch will be made out of construction paper, as well will the resting place of the Olympic flame.

“This should reduce security concerns on several fronts,” said an Olympic official, who asked that his name be kept out of the press until the official announcement is made. “It will also be lighter, easier to protect, and it will never go out. The only thing we have to fear is a sudden bucket of water of freak thunderstorm.” The official went on to say that the cost savings we have an immediate positive impact on the bottom line. “And if it works well enough for the Olympic flame, we may just start building our future Olympic villages out of cardboard, crepe paper, and the like.”

[Editor’s note: Now it is your turn. What bit of writing silliness or seriousness is inspired in you by this photo. Be as creative as you want.]

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Photo Finish Friday: “The Big CrackUp”

“The World’s economy collapsed today when roughly the top third of the globe blew away. Nobody knows right off hand what caused the event to take place, nor why it appears that all of Canada, all of the U.S. — except for Hawaii — and most of Mexico where the hardest hit land masses, if hit was what happened. What has been almost as startling is the discovery that — contrary to scientific theories and the best evidence available until this unfortunate event — the World apparently is hollow.

“Wait, this just in. Apparently, the rest of the world is forming giant cracks, like puzzle pieces. It appears … it appears, ladies and gentlemen, it appears the world is literally cracking up….”

Oh, the humanity....

“Oh, the humanity….”

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Photo finish Friday: “The piano at the loop of time”

Play it again....

Play it again….

“Sam, it’s December 1941 in Casablanca. What time is it in New York?”

“Ah … my watch stopped.”

“I bet they’re asleep in New York. I bet they’re asleep all over America. Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”

Music from the piano.

“What’s that you’re playing?’

“Just a little something I wrote.”

“Stop it. You know what I want to hear.”

“But—”

“You played it for her. You can play it for me. If she can stand it, so I can.”

“But Boss, I played it for you last night.”

“Play it, again.”

“But Boss, I played it for you last night and she didn’t come.”

“She’ll be back, I know it.” He slugs down another drink. He’s had so many, he doesn’t remember what it is.

“But Boss, I played it before and she didn’t come.”

“As Time Goes By” rises up from the upright piano. It is a ghost in the room, rattling the chains of cords and notes. It rattles on and on evoking memories and mistakes.

“Sam, it’s December 1941 in Casablanca. What time is it in New York?”

“Ah … my watch stopped.”

“I bet they’re asleep in New York. I bet they’re asleep all over America. Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”

“Ah … my watch stopped.”

[Editor’s note: with apologies to Casablanca. If you haven’t seen it — what are you waiting on? Now, it’s your turn. What would you write to this photo?]

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Photo finish Friday: “Up in smoke”

[Author’s note: This is where you write a story, poem, even essay based on a photo. I have placed the photo a little further down in the story, but you are free to write what you want based on the photo. The photo is mine, so if you use in a blog or other publication, please give me credit: David E. Booker. Thanks.]

by DAVID E. BOOKER

It was almost the end of his shift when homicide detective C. Sparks got the call to go to possible homicide on East S. Ave. He had plans for his evening, a nice dinner with the victim of another murder case he had worked and solved only three weeks ago. The widow was so grateful that after four months he had not given up on the case and actually figured out who the murdered was and built a solid case with which the D.A. could easily prosecute … and win.

He turned from N. Center St. onto East S. and saw a blue SUV in the middle of the road, a prowl car on the other side of it. Both were in the middle of the street. Both were holding up traffic.

Detective Sparks pulled up behind the SUV. No, he’d block traffic from the N. Center side. He opened his car door and stepped out. The summer heat, even the evening version, was more than any reasonable person should stand, particularly – especially because it was being reflected back up by the baked street asphalt.

The beat cop was talking to a very animated man. Sparks glanced around. There was no body. There were no crime scene technicians. What the hell was going on? Was there a body or was somebody just trying to get him?

The beat officer saw him about the same time he saw her. She broke away from the animated man and met Sparks about halfway from his car to the blue SUV.

“What’s this about?” He looked at the name plate above left breast pocket, then added, “V. Slims.”

“It’s Virginia. Most people call me Virgy.”

“Okay. Virgy, what’s up?”

“This man claims he turned the corner on the E. Scott and out of nowhere this man appears, stops in the middle of the road to light a cigarette and before he could anything, he ran into the guy. He was sure of it. But then he stopped the car and got out and the guy was gone.”

“Yeah, it was as if he disappeared in a cloud of smoke,” the man said.

He had walked up and Sparks hadn’t noticed. Sparks knew then he had been working too many hours.

“And you are?” Sparks asked.

“Leonard M. Bold,” Officer Gordon said. “I checked his ID when rolled I up.”

“Most people call me Leo,” Bold said, extending his hand.

Sparks stared at it for a moment before taking it.

“What were you doing on this street,” Sparks asked.

“I’m in real estate and was driving through this historic neighborhood seeing if there were any houses for sale. See who has them listed. I have a client who might be interested in a historic house.”

Sparks nodded. He then walked up and around the SUV. No sign of dents or broken headlights, or any indication that it had even collided with a house fly let alone a body. The SUV gleamed so brightly, it even hurt his eyes to look at it.

Up In smoke

Up In smoke

He raised his hand to shield his eyes from the sun and that’s when he saw it. Lying on the ground by a front tire, a pack of cigarettes, partially opened.

He squinted a little harder to make out the brand of cigarettes: L, M, Bold. He looked up at the man, then back down at the cigarettes, then up at the man again.

“This is a joke, right? You think you’re funny, calling me out here, Leonard M. Bold.”

“But it’s true, what I said.” Leonard walked over to where Sparks was.

“Yeah, right.” Sparks looked over at Slims. “How much you in on this, Virginia Slims? If that’s your real name. What the hell is going on here.”

Sparks was angry, but even he was surprised when sparks started flying out of his mouth. The first ones hit Officer Virginia Slims and she caught on fire and was burning up. This couldn’t be happening. He turned to look a Leonard, who was already running away.

Sparks yelled after him and flames shot out of his mouth and hit Gold squarely in the back. Gold caught on fire like a book of matches or a pack of cigarettes.

The air smelled like burned tobacco, and Sparks realized how much he actually missed smoking. Even after six years, the craving still seized him every now and then. Right now it was suddenly so strong he might just kill for a cigarette.

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