Sometimes the white hot heat of passion is misleading.
Filed under cartoon by author, Monday morning writing joke
Sometimes, good things take time; and awful things can take even longer.
I’m a writer and I don’t get no respect. A few months back at a writing conference, I happen to talk to an agent and I asked her what was the most important thing she looked for in a manuscript. She said, “Good writing.”
When I got home I immediately sent her my manuscript.
Then I heard nothing.
And after a few more months, I still heard nothing.
Eventually I caught up with the agent at another writing conference and I was about to ask her why I hadn’t heard from her, when she raised a hand and said two words: “Still looking.”
Filed under Monday morning writing joke
by BRUCE HALE
http://clicks.aweber.com/y/ct/?l=O8uEK&m=JmGfH2oV7FLsQz&b=LL0Iif2G_NnGJtQ4.3UMsw
One of the most common questions I get is, “What do you do about writer’s block?” It’s hard to answer. Not because I don’t know,
but because I don’t really believe in writer’s block.
I mean, think about it. We’re the only profession that romanticizes avoiding our work. You don’t hear accountants talking about ‘accountant’s block,’ or dentists moaning, “I couldn’t remove that molar today, Bob; I had dentist’s block.”
But here we sit with our holy bugaboo, writer’s block. Now, don’t get me wrong — I do believe that we have days when it’s hard to write, but I label that as plain old, garden-variety fear and resistance. The same fear that keeps you from asking out someone you ave a crush on (fear of failure). The same resistance that keeps you from starting that new exercise regimen (resistance to change).
Fear and resistance are debilitating enough on their own without giving them a catchy name. So let’s just deal with them the way we do whenever and wherever they show up in our lives. (And no, I don’t mean by surrendering.)
PERFECTION IS THE ENEMY
I’ve noticed that when I feel fear around my writing, it’s usually the fear that it won’t be good enough. Perfection syndrome is insidious, and the only way to beat it is to address it head-on.
First, realize that nothing you write will EVER be perfect — even stories that get published. You can look back at a story you published nine years ago and see things you’d do differently today. Perfection is unattainable.
I think honestly, the best we can shoot for is “as good as I can make it right now.”
So once I’ve given myself permission to write an imperfect first draft, I just jump right into it and start. I write as quickly and sloppily as I can, never minding about proper form, just getting my ideas down on paper (or computer). I know I can always improve the story in the revision stage.
WRITING WARM-UPS
But say you have trouble even getting to the stage of writing a first, sloppy draft. What then? Just as you would with physical exercise, try doing some brief warm-ups before your writing session. You could do a personal journal, or write a journal from your character’s point of view. You could assign yourself a random topic or write about a memory.
One of my favorite ideas is to compile a Bradbury List. Just like Ray Bradbury did when he was a young writer, come up with a list of titles off the top of your head, drawing from childhood fears and fantasies. Then, as a warm-up, pick one title, set your egg timer for 10 minutes, and write a stream-of-consciousness entry about it. Don’t try to craft a story; just let the writing flow.
You may find that you pick up some good material for a future story. You may just get past that initial fear of the blank page and ease into your writing flow. And you may just discover there’s no such thing as writers block.
Here’s the signup link:
http://clicks.aweber.com/y/ct/?l=O8uEK&m=JmGfH2oV7FLsQz&b=LL0Iif2G_NnGJtQ4.3UMsw
Filed under Writer's Block, Writing Tip Wednesday
Sometimes it’s hard to blow your own horn.
I recently attended a music festival to try to sell some of my books when I overheard one musician say this about my writing to another musician: “His writing reminds you of a clarinet — a wind instrument.”
Blurb for the memoir of Bob the electrician:
“His story was electrifying. Certain to have a positive impact on your life.”
Blurb for mortician’s erotic horror novel:
“His debut novel will keep you up all night and leave you feeling stiff the next morning.”
Blurb for a pharmacist’s self-help book:
“This book is the perfect Rx for what ails you.”
Blurb for a plumber’s thriller:
“This book leaves you drained.”
Blurb for a pet groomer’s memoir:
“His brush with death will leave you panting for more.”
Blurb for a firefighter’s collection of short stories:
“His wit is only matched by his striking ability to fire the reader’s imagination.”
From Wikipedia:
A blurb is a short summary accompanying a creative work … The word blurb originated in 1907. American humorist Gelett Burgess’s short 1906 book Are You a Bromide? was presented in a limited edition to an annual trade association dinner. The custom at such events was to have a dust jacket promoting the work and with, as Burgess’ publisher B. W. Huebsch described it,
“the picture of a damsel — languishing, heroic, or coquettish — anyhow, a damsel on the jacket of every novel”
In this case the jacket proclaimed “YES, this is a ‘BLURB’!” and the picture was of a (fictitious) young woman “Miss Belinda Blurb” shown calling out, described as “in the act of blurbing.”
The name and term stuck for any publisher’s contents on a book’s back cover, even after the picture was dropped and only the complimentary text remained.
To blurb or not to blurb, that is the question.
Sometimes, there’s just no accounting for taste.
I tell ya, I’m a writer and I don’t get no respect. I just got back from my quarterly beating … I mean meeting with my accountant. We went over my deductions as a writer. He said I should be careful what I claim. After we’re done and I’m leaving, he leans over and tells his partner, “He writes books nobody will read and checks nobody will cash.”
Since when did accountants become book critics? Cook ’em, yeah, but read one and have an opinion? Next time he puts his two cents in, I’ll make sure it’s in the right column, the one for trash. I know only too well where that one is.
Filed under cartoon by author, Monday morning writing joke
I edit, write, design, edit, even do some the photography for a neighborhood newsletter for the historic neighborhood in which I live. Below is what I am working as part of the newsletter. I did not take the photos, but have cropped and processed them. They were color. They are now black and white, because the newsletter is printed in black and white.
Some of my neighbors went on rafting trip a couple of months back and the photos are from that day trip. The poem, “The Captain said,” is mine.
Neighbors Lauren Rider (left) and Pete Creel (right) head into some rough waters.
The boat is fine, the captain said;
he said it to our face.
The boat is fine, the captain said,
the river sets the pace.
The boat is fine, the captain said,
and then he said no more.
The boat is fine, the captain said
as we sailed away from shore.
The boat is fine, the captain said,
as the river tossed us about.
The boat is fine, the captain said,
as some of us wanted out.
The boat is fine, the captain said,
steering for the roughest part.
The boat is fine, the captain said;
he’d said it from the start.
The boat is fine, the captain said
as the waves thumped into the boat
The boat is fine, the captain said
as some of us tried to float.
The boat is fine, the captain said,
Come back again next year.
The boat is fine, the captain said —
but captain, I hope you’re not here.
Pete Creel takes an unplanned dip in the river.
Pete said the best place to sit on the raft was in the center, but two people had quickly seized those seats before he and Lauren could get in. He said he also felt that at times the captain / person steering the raft, aimed for the roughest patches of water to make sure he and the other members of the crew got their money’s worth in experience.
Filed under neighborhood, newsletter, poetry by author, writing
Getting less for more. Sometimes its hard to please any reader.
While at a book signing the other day, I overheard one person say to the other as they walked by my table: “He makes me wish I had a lower IQ so I could enjoy his book.”
Filed under no respect
“I write for the same reason I breathe — because if I didn’t, I would die.”
–Isaac Asimov
So, take a deep breath and plunge on into it. Even if you don’t know exactly what you’re doing, splash a few words around and see what happens. Think of the blank sheet of paper or the blank screen as a scene waiting to be discovered.
You might just have a masterpiece within you. Remember that Michelangelo took a block of marble rejected by his contemporaries and saw the statue ‘David’ within it. All he had to do, he said, was chip away the pieces not needed in order to create his masterpiece.
Many times a writer has to do the same thing. The block of marble is the first draft. The subsequent drafts are chipping away at that marble, removing the pieces you don’t need. Easy? No. But from a rejected pile of words can come your masterpiece. You have to be honest with yourself and hold true to your vision of the story and commit to it with confidence … and write as if you were breathing.
Even out of ruined or rejected scenes can come your masterpiece.
Filed under Photo by author, Writing Tip Wednesday
Writing tip: keeping tabs on your favorite writer can be surprising.
I’m a writer and I don’t get no respect. I went into a bar that caters to well-known writers.
I told the bar tender, “Give me what your best writer has most often in here.”
She promptly handed me the tab.
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