Tag Archives: writing humor

cARtOONSDAY:” sTORMY bEGINNING”

The difference between the right word and the almost right word sill won't save some beginnings.

The difference between the right word and the almost right word sill won’t save some beginnings.

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cARtOONSDAY: “vICES aND vIRTUES”

Willard faces a low period, or maybe no period at all.

Willard faces a low period, or maybe no period at all.

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cARtOONSDAY: “bEHIND eVERY gREAT nOVELIST”

Like twists in the plot, so are the days of the novelist.

Like twists in the plot, so are the days of the novelist.

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Monday morning writing joke: “In a jamb”

The house is alarmed.
The window is startled.
And the floor is somewhat taken aback.
All because…
…the door is ajar.

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cARtOONSDAY: “fIRST dRAFT!”

There is a draft -- stoked by the flames of indignation.

There is a draft — stoked by the flames of indignation.

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Monday morning writing joke: “Zombies, part 3”

Q.: What did the French zombie waiter say to his customers?

A.: “Brain appetite.”

A zombie went to a zombie doctor for his yearly checkup. The doctor asked him what he had been eating lately.

The zombie said, “Writer’s brains.”

The zombie doctor told him to quit before he got “Clogged authories.”

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cARtOONSDAY: “mORNING”

It was so rainy, the fish were out of their banks and looking to get into his.

It was so rainy, the fish were out of their banks and looking to get into his.

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Monday morning writing joke: “Excitement”

First joke writer: I can’t quite come up with a finish for this joke: “You know you’re an older writer when….” and that’s as far as I get.

Second joke writer: “You know you’re an older writer when your wife surprises you with a box of 20-pound bond paper and it excites you in ways you hadn’t thought possible.”

First joke writer: Sounds like that happened to you.

Second joke writer: It did. Then the reality of having to fill all those blank pages sank in and dulled it all.

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Monday morning writing joke: “R&D”

An experienced writer was showing his house to a novice writer when they passed by a door marked “R&D.”

Novice writer: “Wow. I didn’t know you had your own R&D room.”

Experienced writer: “You, too, may have one one day.”

Novice writer: “You mean my own Research and Development room?”

Experienced writer: “No, your own Rejected and Dejected room where your failed manuscripts go.”

“Oh,” the novice writer said, suddenly not quite so excited.

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Monday morning writing joke: “Backwards”

Two comedy writers sitting in a diner.

First writer: “I went to see a shrink yesterday for my writer’s block.”

Second writer nods between forkfuls of fried potatoes. “What did she say?”

First writer: “She asked me to spell money backwards.”

Second writer: “Did you?”

First writer nods as he puts his napkin down: “D-e-b-t.”

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