A man and a stop that need no introduction.
Filed under 2021, Silly Saturday
The sign
A sign of the times /
Keep your clothes on is not /
Just an expression.
.
.
#haiku #poem #poetry #poet #writing #writer #humor #pun #sign #socialdistance #stripclub #monday #2020 #clothes #davidebooker #virus #coronavirus #covid_19
Filed under 2020, haiku, Poetry by David E. Booker
Nodding off, he read /
the bright sign: “Don’t drive drow —” /
He dreamed the end.
Filed under 2017, Haiku to You Thursday, poetry by author
Dips in the gene pool.
Not to mention it will ruin the pool for the other people, because the pool will have to close to clean up your carcass.
Filed under 2015, photo by David E. Booker, Photo Finish Friday
Lost souls? Lost comma? Lost apostrophe? Oh, heavens.
If you have read Eats, Shoots and Leaves by Lynne Truss, you know the power of the comma, the apostrophe, and other well-placed parts of punctuation. Far be it for me to comment on a man’s beliefs (Okay, maybe not that far be it.), but in this case, I think it is more a matter of the missing-in-action comma and apostrophe. As it is, this church signage can lead one to believe this church is devoted to deprogramming the devout, to redirecting the religiously inclined, to subduing the souls of those who believe.
The name of the church, which is Christian, would make more sense if the sign read, “Overcoming, Believers’ Church.” As it is, the name, particularly in large white letters on a large slate-gray building (the photo only shows a part of the church exterior) looks a bit like something out of the X-Files. The aliens have stolen our apostrophes!
Filed under Photo by author, Photo Finish Friday
Would you buy a yard (of anything) from this “man”?
Does this mean that all the best buys have already been “picked clean”?
Filed under Photo by author, Photo Finish Friday
The blathering idiot was not sure what to make of the new rest room sign.
There had been complaints about how some of the blathering idiot’s co-workers had been mistreating the restroom facilities, so management had devised a new sign to help everyone understand. It was all in pictures in the hopes that there would be no confusion. Still, the blathering idiot had a few questions.
He understood that an “X” through the drawing meant do something or that is was wrong to do something. And from the new chart, he saw that it was okay to sit on the commode. Though all it looked the man was doing was sitting there and resting. His pants did not look pulled down and he was sitting too erect to be doing anything. A man needed to lean forward a little more when he pooped. And good luck if he tried to pee while sitting that way.
The second drawing puzzled the blathering idiot. Why would a man pour marbles into a commode?
Then there was the third drawing. Was that man praying?
As for the fourth drawing, he wondered why any man would try to ride a commode like a jockey. Had somebody at work really done that?
And then there was fishing in the commode. He had never thought of that. But certainly what was in there was not usually worth fishing for to begin with. Even he knew that. Unless, maybe, you accidentally dropped something in before doing anything else. What do yo do then? Call your supervisor?
As for the last drawing, it was the oddest of them all. It looked like a man squatting back from the commode and taking aim with an object or some sort, maybe even a child’s toy like a missile or torpedo, and trying to aim it at the commode. Did he mean to blow up the commode? Was he trying to throw into the commode something that he hadn’t been able to get to come out until he gave up sitting on the commode the way the man in the first drawing was? He did look a little like he was squatting, after all.
The blathering idiot pondered this poster until he couldn’t come up with any answers that made sense. He went to his supervisor for guidance, but all his boss would say is that it was being used in the Olympics and that if it was clear enough for them, it should be clear enough for everybody working for him.
The blathering idiot felt it was going to be a long shift.
Filed under blathering idiot
Sometimes a little unincorporated Ditty is all you need.
Filed under Photo by author, Photo Finish Friday
The blathering idiot had never stopped to read the sign until Xenia asked him about it. They were in a restaurant. One that she had selected and he had taken her to in order to help out his on-again, off-again girl friend Zoey. He was doing this to try to get back into her good graces.
But Xenia’s question was proving hard to answer. Maybe too hard. He stood in the rest room, hands over the sink, waiting for an answer, or even somebody to ask. But for ten minutes now nobody came in the rest room. No employee even bothered to poke his head in.
So, all he could do was stand, bent over the sink, hands under the dripping faucet, back twinging, and read the sign next to the mirror over and over and over again:
Employees must wash hands
Sooner or later one of them had to come in, and at that moment, he would make that person wash his hands and then he would return to finish supper with Xenia, and he would never come to this restaurant ever again, particularly if he had to tip the employee for this slow service.
[Editor’s note: other blathering idiot “adventures” available by clicking on the “blathering idiot” tag below.]
Filed under blathering idiot, hands, humor, sign, wash
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