Tag Archives: lion

Monday morning writing joke: “Bones of a story”

An old Doberman starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he’s lost.

Wandering about, he notices a lion heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old Doberman thinks, “Oh, oh! I’m in deep shit now!”

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.

Just as the lion is about to leap, the old Doberman exclaims, “Boy, that was one delicious lion! I wonder, if there are any more around here?”

Hearing this, the young lion halts his attack in mid-stride, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

“Whew,” says the lion, “that was close! That old Doberman nearly had me.”

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the lion. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the lion, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the lion.

The young lion is furious at being made a fool of and says, “Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what’s going to happen to that conniving canine!”

Now, the old Doberman sees the lion coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, “What am I going to do now?” Instead of running, the dog  sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn’t seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old Doberman says…

“Where’s that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another lion.”

And there you have the bones of a story.

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Monday (morning) writing joke: “Lionized”

A hungry African lion came across two men. One was sitting under a tree and reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.

Observation: Maybe that’s why Hemingway was never eaten on safari.The lions were more afraid of his typewriter than his rife.

Inverse observation: Even lions reject writers. Writers just aren’t a lion’s type.

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Monday morning writing joke: Lion about

A writer embraces her lion

When writing, the main thing is to not let the lion cramp your style.

A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.

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Never more true

Where the skies are blue and the lions, too.

Where the skies are blue and the lions, too.

If worse comes to worst, start writing verse.
A rhyme in time will take your mind
away from this cursed ‘verse.
It will take you to worlds never you knew.
It will take you to worlds never more true.
Where the skies are blue and the lions are, too.

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Filed under cartoon by author, poem, rhyming poetry