Nude man armed with chain saw arrested in East Knox County
Source: http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2012/jul/12/nude-man-armed-with-chain-saw-arrested-in-east/
Below is a rewritten summation of the story.
KNOXVILLE, TN — On Wednesday, July 11, 2012, 46-year-old man, L.M.S. of Knox County was arrested because he was nude while using a chain saw to cut up a large tree that had toppled in his yard. Apparently, though appearances can be deceiving, this was not the first time he had subjected his neighbors to an au natural display of himself, though it may have been the first time he had done so with a chain saw.
He had occasionally been appearing in the nude for over a decade in this neighborhood in Knox County, but this time a neighbor complained about a public display of nudity by a nearly bald man obviously weighing more than the 210 lbs. listed on his driver’s license.
When Knox County Sheriff’s Deputy S.R. arrived at the scene, he later wrote in his report: “I saw arrestee standing behind the tree in his yard. When arrestee saw me, he ran inside his residence. Arrestee had no clothes on and was clearly visible from the complainant’s residence and the surrounding homes.”
L.M.S. was arrested, charged with indecent exposure, and was freed from the Knox County Sheriff’s Detention Facility after posting a $750 bond.
The neighbor who called in the complaint was reported to have said L.M.S.’s display of himself in the buff was “so common,” it had become a neighborhood joke.
A few editorial thoughts about this incident:
Maybe he was sleep chain sawing and didn’t realize it. You know, sawing some logs, so to say.
Or maybe he was caught up in the fervor of the upcoming Summer Olympics in London, possibly even wanting nude chain saw tree cutting to be a trial sport. Of course, it would be a little more difficult to identify which country he (or other participants) might be representing. He would be, however, competing in the style of the original Greek Olympics in which the participants did conduct their events in the nude. (I guess that was to make sure nobody was hiding any secret elixirs from the nearby temple at Delphi. Had to worry about doping even then.)
I say relocate him to Alaska, have him and others like him (After all, I’m sure he’s not alone.) chain saw trees in winter in the nude, and call the show, “Nude Loggers of the North: the chain, the pain, the complain.” Maybe ESPN and the Weather Channel could co-sponsor it.
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Nude man armed with chain saw arrested in East Knox County
Source: http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2012/jul/12/nude-man-armed-with-chain-saw-arrested-in-east/
Below is a rewritten summation of the story.
KNOXVILLE, TN — On Wednesday, July 11, 2012, 46-year-old man, L.M.S. of Knox County was arrested because he was nude while using a chain saw to cut up a large tree that had toppled in his yard. Apparently, though appearances can be deceiving, this was not the first time he had subjected his neighbors to an au natural display of himself, though it may have been the first time he had done so with a chain saw.
He had occasionally been appearing in the nude for over a decade in this neighborhood in Knox County, but this time a neighbor complained about a public display of nudity by a nearly bald man obviously weighing more than the 210 lbs. listed on his driver’s license.
When Knox County Sheriff’s Deputy S.R. arrived at the scene, he later wrote in his report: “I saw arrestee standing behind the tree in his yard. When arrestee saw me, he ran inside his residence. Arrestee had no clothes on and was clearly visible from the complainant’s residence and the surrounding homes.”
L.M.S. was arrested, charged with indecent exposure, and was freed from the Knox County Sheriff’s Detention Facility after posting a $750 bond.
The neighbor who called in the complaint was reported to have said L.M.S.’s display of himself in the buff was “so common,” it had become a neighborhood joke.
A few editorial thoughts about this incident:
Maybe he was sleep chain sawing and didn’t realize it. You know, sawing some logs, so to say.
Or maybe he was caught up in the fervor of the upcoming Summer Olympics in London, possibly even wanting nude chain saw tree cutting to be a trial sport. Of course, it would be a little more difficult to identify which country he (or other participants) might be representing. He would be, however, competing in the style of the original Greek Olympics in which the participants did conduct their events in the nude. (I guess that was to make sure nobody was hiding any secret elixirs from the nearby temple at Delphi. Had to worry about doping even then.)
I say relocate him to Alaska, have him and others like him (After all, I’m sure he’s not alone.) chain saw trees in winter in the nude, and call the show, “Nude Loggers of the North: the chain, the pain, the complain.” Maybe ESPN and the Weather Channel could co-sponsor it.
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Tagged as chain saw, commentary, humor, Knox County, Knoxville, nudity, satire