Tag Archives: Grand Panjandrum

October 11, 2011 · 9:32 pm

From the Grand Panjandrum’s non-sequitur department

Questions you are not likely to see on CPR class form:

  • 1) If an employee already looks dead, do you:
      A) try to revive them
      B) first look around for any office supplies you can pilfer/use and then try to revive them
      C) pilfer and let them be, leaving the decision to try to revive to the next co-worker who stumbles across the body?
  • 2) CPR stands for:
      A) Cash Preferred by Retailer
      B) Cash Preferred by Resuscitator (The I can’t spend glory principle.)
      C) Cardiac Pulmonary Rest (What is happening when you can’t breathe and your heart has stopped beating)?

    • Other questions may become available as time and dementia permits.

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    Filed under absurdity, CPR, fun, Grand Panjandrum, humor, non-sequitur, word play

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