Sunday silliness: two poems in response to Facebook postings

[Editor’s note: both of these poems I wrote in quick fashion, a bit of silliness, a bit of fun. Taking maybe 30 minutes each, at most.]

Minister of the dart

O’ minister of the dart
whose aim is true,
sending the dart flying
threw and through.

Toward the bull’s eye
your throw did wend
with an aim so perfect
your foes became friends.

O’ minister of the dart
whose aim is true
I’ve never seen a bull cry,
until now. Have you?

Written on March 5th in response to a Facebook posting by Chris Buice, minister at the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church in Knoxville, TN, in which he wrote about throwing the winning dart in a game that gone so long that even his opponents cheered.

_____________

That four-foot long

Put that four-foot long
back where it belongs —
don’t leave it out in the aisle.
Put back that four-foot long
with the smell so strong —
don’t leave it in a public pile.
Put away that four-foot long
you silly ding-dong —
even at Fellini we have a style.
A code we relate
no need to masticate
or pretend to be in denial.
So, put that four-foot long
back where it belongs —
don’t leave it out for public trial.

Written on March 9th in response to a Facebook posting by Brian Griffin about being in the Fellini Kroger in Knoxville, TN. If you don’t know, you can use Google and find out all about it. There is even a Fellini Kroger Facebook page and another for Friends of Fellini Kroger. As far as anyone can tell, the Italian director never set foot in Fellini Kroger … at least not in this plane of existence.

And in case you are wondering, the four-foot long is a sausage, not a snake, though who knows, someday that may happen in Fellini K.

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40 Worst Book Covers and Titles Ever | Bored Panda

40 Worst Book Covers and Titles Ever | Bored Panda.

Not sure I agree with all the selections here, but an interesting collection. Might even spark conversation if not contemplation.

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General ‘Jerry’ Boykin Says Gun-Toting Jesus Will Lead ‘Mighty Army’ During Second Coming

General 'Jerry' Boykin Says Gun-Toting Jesus Will Lead 'Mighty Army' During Second Coming.

Are you ready for the “rough and ready” Jesus? One not feminized by the church?

And to think my tax dollars went to pay for the training and the salary of this “general.” God help us.

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These Books Actually Exist – The Meta Picture

These Books Actually Exist – The Meta Picture.

Are you ready to read: “The Right to Arm Bears”? How about “Knitting with Dog Hair”? These are two of the twenty titles.

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Jon Stewart harpoons the Fox “whale”

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Photo finish Friday: “Bridge to nowhere”

Another wrong turn.

Another wrong turn.

She came down to the bridge to end it all, to jump off into the cold March waters. To feel her weight and the weight of her burdens become weightless as the water lapped over her in one last shivering embrace. Then she saw that the bridge was closed. The pylons and arches were there, but the platform was gone. There was nowhere to jump from. She sighed. It was just another in all the wrong turns in her life, and like all the others, she would just have to learn to live with it.

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Leaves”

Give me all you love. /

Leave your hate beneath the tall tree. /

The leaves will shape it.

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Lauren Oliver’s Writing Secrets – 5 Secrets To Writing The Next Great American Novel – Cosmopolitan

Lauren Oliver's Writing Secrets – 5 Secrets To Writing The Next Great American Novel – Cosmopolitan.

Sample:

Lauren Oliver, who wrote the addictive-as-crack Delirium novels, has a new, bursting-with-intense-teen-romance novel out, Panic, about desperate kids competing for coveted prize, living not in an alternative future dystopia, but in a small town in upstate New York. Oliver herself lives in New York City and is a 31 year old badass who has written 7 novels and already had four New York Times bestsellers. Hello, impressive. She shares some secrets behind all that mad productivity. (Hey, put her tips to good work and enter the Cosmo Fiction contest, here.)

1. Make it part of your routine.
When I started writing, I had to force myself to do it everyday. Now, it’s a habit like brushing my teeth. Can you imagine how gross you would feel if you didn’t brush your teeth for a whole day? That’s how I feel now when I don’t write.

2. Figure out what works for you and your life and stick to it.
I kind of write all over the place, since I’m often traveling or bouncing around between commitments and meetings. The funniest place I do writing is on my phone. I’ve stayed loyal to BlackBerry for years because of the keyboards — I can type as quickly on a BlackBerry as I can on a computer. I wrote most of my first novel, Before I Fall on my BlackBerry. I think they should give me a sponsorship, seriously.

[Editor’s note: for the other three, click on the link above. First, can you guess what they are? Hint: one is about applying the seat of the pants to the seat of the chair.]

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I agree with Hanif Kureishi – creative writing courses are a waste of time | Books | theguardian.com

I agree with Hanif Kureishi – creative writing courses are a waste of time | Books | theguardian.com.

Sample:

I agree with Hanif Kureishi – creative writing courses are a waste of time

The novelist and professor Hanif Kureishi has voiced criticism of creative writing courses – and having been on one, I find it hard to disagree. Share your experiences below…

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cARtOONSDAY: “wILLARD’S mOUNTAIN”

John Boy Walton's mountain couldn't have been much higher.

John Boy Walton’s mountain couldn’t have been much higher.

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