Filed under bird, Cartoon, child, humor, Philosopher, Random Access Thoughts, Uncategorized
We have reached a level of entertainment on par with the Roman Coliseum. We have senseless wars abroad, senseless politics at home, and senseless entertainment all around.
Submitted for your consideration, this promo for a local sporting event:
“Come out and cheer on your Knoxville Ice Bears on Guaranteed Fight Night. We guarantee all the fans in attendance there will be a fight whether it occurs during one of the three periods or during the intermissions. Bring yourself, your friends and your family to come find out what we have planned for you.”
Yes, bring your family, if for no other reason than to see a fight at a hockey game. Reminds me of that joke, I went to a fight and a hockey game broke out.
What’s next, a merger with Rasslin’ and possibly the Icecapades or some other ice show. Will we see Snow White duking it out with Little Red Riding Hood? Goofy and Pluto illegally checking each other? Rasslin’ with the Stars on Ice? (Well, that might actually have some socially redeeming value.) All of it family fun. And all for one, low admission price. Please pay these prices and pay no more.
Filed under Random Access Thoughts, Uncategorized
I know this isn’t directly related to writing, but I’m going to ask a question. But first look at the follow text:
***The New Year Award***
British Online [info@live.co.uk]
Dear lucky winner,
We happily announce to you the new year draw (1068) of the UK NATIONAL LOTTERY,online sweepstakes International program held on the 6th of January 2010. Your e-mail address attached to ticket number: 56475600545188 with Serial number 5368/02 drew the lucky numbers:07-10-22-24-34-44 (Bonus number 18).You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of £2,532,137 (Two million, Five hundred and Thirty Two Thousand, One Hundred and Thirty Seven pounds sterling).
To file for your claim, fill the winner verification form below and forward to the fudiciary agent immediately via email.
Agents Name:Hughes Stanford
Email: claimsdirector29@sify.com
Phone: +44-703-192-6694 Fax: +44-702-407-2356
VERIFICATION AND FUNDS RELEASE FORM
Full Name.
Contact Address.
Nationality.
Sex.
Telephone Number.
Occupation.
Once again congratulations…
Cordially,
Sir George Arisson
Online Co-ordinator
***********
So, okay, here is my question. Do people in England, Austria, India, Pakistan, and all points in between receive similarly cockamamie e-mails offering equally preposterous scenarios? Are they offers to transfer funds from American banks to their bank accounts if they provide every piece of personal data about themselves, except the size of their bicuspids?
I’ve received offers from the widows of deposed Africa rulers, to royalty whose family line has petered out and the last living heir wants to share the wealth with the closest distant relative, and I’m it by some Darwinian fickle finger of fate.
I was disabused years ago of my illusion that Chinese fortunes in Chinese fortune cooks were a Chinese tradition and that they came from some Chinese equivalent of the Ancient Greek Oracles. It is an American twist and the fortunes are written primarily by two small groups, and they have even done market research trying to find out what sort of “fortunes” people want to read. Hence, you now get fortunes that read: “True happiness is what you make of it.” Or, “Smile and you will enjoy the world more.” Nothing too cryptic. Nothing bad.
And what does that have to do with e-mails promising fortunes for little effort? Nothing, except in both cases you will probably walk away with less than you started with if you put too much faith in already being a winner when you’ve done almost nothing to earn it.
Filed under Random Access Thoughts, Uncategorized
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Booker's Blog 
Sign of times: Quality Used Furniture
While the photo is not the clearest it could be, in its own way it may match the hand-painted sign that reads “Quality Used Furniture,” and underneath it are sections of firewood. Could the sign be referring to the birds that once nested in the tree’s branches? To the squirrels, rodents though they may be, that once frolicked about from sturdy limb to sturdy limb as they ventured forth from their squirrel nest? Or is this type of furniture what is meant by rustic or roughing it? Possibly this is a Platonic set of furniture. Furniture glimpsed obliquely and incompletely in its state of perfection.
What do you think it is? Make up your own caption and send it my way. I may list the most interesting ones.
The sign read: Quality Used Furniture
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Filed under bird, Commentary, furniture, humor, nature, Plato, sign of the times, tree, Uncategorized, word play, words, writing
Tagged as commentary, fun, furniture, humor, LinkedIn, nature, Plato, sign of the times, tree, wood, word play, words, writing