Monthly Archives: July 2015

Monday morning writing joke: “Protagonist”

There once was a writer from Lexington /

Who had four daughters, but no son. /

He cried and he sighed /

And he wanted to know why. /

Then he made all his heroes be women.

***

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

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Kafka’s Metamorphosis: 100 thoughts for 100 years

Kafka’s tale of a man who wakes to find he has changed into a giant insect still has the power to shock and delight a century after it was first published. Many regard it as the greatest short story in all literary fiction.

by RICHARD T. KELLY

Source: http://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/jul/18/franz-kafka-metamorphosis-100-thoughts-100-years

  1. What need a modern reader know of Franz Kafka’s Metamorphosis (Die Verwandlung) – arguably the most famous, also greatest, short story in the history of literary fiction?
  2. Franz Kafka

    Franz Kafka

  3. Of its stature, for example, Elias Canetti wrote that the story was something Kafka “could never surpass, because there is nothing which Metamorphosis could be surpassed by”. As endorsements go, the bar could not be set higher.
  4. Kafka’s place in the literary pantheon has been assured for some time, most pleasingly expressed by George Steiner’s suggestion that he is the only author of whom it may be said that he made his own a letter of the alphabet – K.
  5. Here, though, is a little novelty: in 2015, Metamorphosis is 100 years old. At least, 1915 is when the story was published, which is to say “finished”; and Kafka, famously, didn’t finish very much.
  6. Kafka worked on Metamorphosis through the autumn of 1912 and completed a version on 7 December that year. But negotiations with publishers were complicated, and circumstances – the first world war, among other things – intervened.
  7. Finally Metamorphosis was set before readers in October 1915, in the avant-garde monthly Die Weissen Blätter, then put between covers that December.
  8. A century on, why does Metamorphosis still attract readers? One reason is that it’s a horror story of sorts. Its premise – a man awakens in the body of an insect – exerts a ghastly fascination beyond anything in even the consummate short works of Chekhov or Joyce or Alice Munro.
  9. Another is that it is, amid its pathos, awfully funny. Gregor Samsa wakes to discover he has six legs and a shell, yet for some pages he thinks that what ails him might just be the kind of throat complaint that is “the occupational malady of travellers”. What can you do but laugh?
  10. And there’s more. As Gregor struggles to crawl off his bed, a clerk from his company calls at the Samsa apartment. As Vladimir Nabokov commented: “This grim speed in checking a remiss employee has all the qualities of a bad dream.” But it is also farce: a personal embarrassment raised to a debacle by multiple easily shocked persons arriving on the scene to witness it.
  11. Metamorphosis exemplifies the world Kafka invented on paper – recognisable but not quite real, precisely detailed and yet dreamlike.
  12. We call this world “Kafkaesque”, of course, while keeping mindful of Italo Calvino’s lament that one hears that term “every quarter of an hour, applied indiscriminately”.
  13. I’ll venture we mean “Kafkaesque” to denote a sense of suddenly inhabiting a world in which one’s customary habits of thought and behaviour are confounded and made hopeless.
  14. To dig a little deeper, the term evokes an individual’s sense of finding himself victimised by large impersonal forces, feeling after a while that he can’t but take it personally – and feeling haunted, too, by the sense that maybe, after all, he deserves it.
  15. If you grant the preceding, then Metamorphosis is perhaps the quintessential Kafka story.
  16. Given how well the story has aged, it is telling that Kafka at first didn’t wholly delight in his handiwork. Even as he inspected the proofs he was unpersuaded. (“Unreadable ending. Imperfect almost to its very marrow.”)
  17. But the very fact that Metamorphosis was read, chuckled over and frowned on while Kafka was alive may bear repeating; for the myth rather persists that Kafka was unknown and unpublished in his lifetime.
  18. Though his great fame was posthumous, he did have a reputation to speak of while he was alive. If a minor figure, he nonetheless had a better class of admirer (e.g., Robert Musil).
  19. In 1915 the dramatist Carl Sternheim, winner of the prestigious Theodor Fontane prize, bestowed his prize money on Kafka as a mark of writer-to-writer respect.
  20. (Can you imagine the Man Booker prizewinner of 2015 declaring from the dais that s/he plans to hand over the £50,000 to a rival novelist whose stuff s/he considers so much better?)
  21. Legendarily, though, Kafka had no bigger fan than his university friend Max Brod, who decided early on that Kafka was a genius, and duly ended up saving his works from incineration.

For the rest of the 100 thoughts, go to: http://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/jul/18/franz-kafka-metamorphosis-100-thoughts-100-years

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Twilight Zone script: “Walking Distance”

From the Famous Writers Course. Part of the Famous Writers School in Westport, CT. I don’t believe the school or the course is in existence today.

Front cover of the facsimile script.

Front cover of the facsimile script.

Inside, first page.

Inside, first page.

“There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space, and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between land and shadow — between science and superstition. And it lies between the pit of man’s fears and the summit of his knowledge. It is an area which we call The Twilight Zone.

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Photo finish Friday: “Berry good”

What would you do if your raspberries wanted to mix it up with your blueberries or blackberries?

What would you do if your raspberries wanted to mix it up with your blueberries or blackberries?

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Longings”

World full of wonder. /

The angel of death leaves soon. /

Short are the longings.

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cARtOONSdAY: “wITCH oVENS?”

Sign inside Hansel and Gretel Exotic Foods Factory.

Sign inside Hansel and Gretel Exotic Foods Factory.

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Monday morning writing joke: “Maine frame of mind”

There once was a writer from Maine /

Who wrote about the strange and insane. /

“Your writing reminds me of King.” /

Those words would always sting, /

Until he stuffed their remains down the drain.

***

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

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The Devil’s Dictionary: “Un-American and Understanding”

In our continuing quest to revisit a classic, or even a curiosity from the past and see how relevant it is, we continue with The Devil’s Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce. Originally published in newspaper installments from 1881 until 1906. You might be surprised how current many of the entries are.

A young Ambrose Bierce

A young Ambrose Bierce

For example, here is a definition for the words Un-American and Understanding. The Old definitions are Bierce’s. The New definitions are, in many cases, updates. Sometimes little change is needed. Sometimes more. From time to time, just as it was originally published, we will come back to The Devil’s Dictionary, for a look at it then and how it applies today. Click on Devil’s Dictionary in the tags below to bring up the other entries.

OLD DEFINITION
Un-American, adj. Wicked, intolerable, heathenish.

Understanding, n. A cerebral secretion that enables one having it to know a house from a horse by the roof on the house. Its nature and laws have been exhaustively expounded by Locke, who rode a house, and Kant, who lived in a horse.

His understanding was so keen
That all things which he’d felt, heard, seen,
He could interpret without fail
If he was in or out of jail.
He wrote at Inspiration’s call
Deep disquisitions on them all,
Then, pent at last in an asylum,
Performed the service to compile ’em.
So great a writer, all men swore,
They never had not read before.
—Jorrock Wormley

NEW DEFINITION
Un-American, adj. Wicked, intolerable, heathenish.

Example, the rest of the world and the Democratic Party as defined by Faux News.

Example, anything the other politician stands for, even if it’s very much like what the accuser stands for.

Example, anything that requires understanding, or as one politician recently said, “big syllable words.”

Understanding, n. See Un-American.

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Photo finish Friday: “Flushed with reading”

You need a place to rest your book.

You need a place to rest your book.

Don't try this with an unabridged dictionary.

Don’t try this with an unabridged dictionary.

Do you live with your novels as you are reading them? Even in the bathroom?

But maybe you have no bookshelf or place to temporarily rest the book. What do you do? Why, the toilet paper dispenser might be your friend.

Not recommended for heavy books or picture books of odd-sized dimensions. But the right book at the right time with the roll of toilet paper at the right diameter, and you have a temporary bookshelf while you await the flush of success.

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Dream stars”

Tonight I dream stars. /

Worlds enveloped in wonder. /

My dog wants a walk.

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