Monthly Archives: February 2014

Photo finish Friday: “Won’t last”

Bear and Skeleton talk about their relationship.

Bear and Skeleton talk about their relationship.

They said it wouldn’t last. Friends, neighbors, even strangers on the street when asked would immediately react to the announcement that a skeleton was dating a stuffed bear. Often with disbelieving looks and the wry comment: “It won’t last.”

But thus far, the relationship has held together and so has Skeleton.

“Oh, sure, we’ve sometimes had a bone to pick with each other,” Bear said.

“But it never got so bad, we couldn’t bear it,” Skeleton said, finishing the bear’s thoughts as couples often do.

They sometimes still get hate mail or calls in the middle of the night where the caller yells something hateful and then hangs up. Once a woman walked up to them in public and said they should be hanging out with their own kind.

“But we are,” said Bear. “We are hanging out with those that care.”

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Writing tip Wednesday: “Editing”

WHEN TO SAY WHEN: HOW MUCH EDITING IS ENOUGH?

by BRUCE HALE

http://www.brucehalewritingtips.com/

One of the most common questions I hear from writing students is “How do I know when to stop editing and revising my story?” Or in other words, “when do I say when?”

I ran into this same problem when making ahi stir-fry yesterday. I seared the fish awhile, then made a guess and tossed in the vegetables. (Wolfgang Puck I’m not.)

I wondered how long to let the whole mess fry. Would I overcook the fish or undercook the veggies? Finally, a gut feeling said, “Whoops, the fish might be too well-done.” Turned out that feeling was right.

With a meal, it’s too late (unless you’ve got a hungry dog handy). Overcooked isn’t curable. But with a story, provided you’ve saved your earlier drafts, over-edited isn’t irreversible.

So when do you stop cooking your story?

I believe this decision comes from a gut feeling – a blend of experience and intuition.

ONE AND DONE?
Kids do one draft and believe they’re done. But experience has taught us adult writers the importance of rewriting. Of course, the danger is that we can tend to over-think, over-edit, and try to make our story perfect.

Big news: Your story doesn’t need to be perfect. In fact it will never be perfect, because story writing isn’t like math. There isn’t one absolute, right answer.

In fact, I’d even go so far as to say that attachment to perfection is the enemy of art. In trying to get it “perfect”, we inhibit ourselves from freely expressing, and we can kill what’s alive in our
work.

So when you edit, don’t aim for “perfect.” Shoot for “as good as I can make it right now.” Your gut will guide you.

If you’re feeling too close to the story, have a trusted writing partner read it and comment. Then, if you’re still not sure, ask yourself some questions:

— Have I solicited feedback from readers I trust?

— Have I incorporated suggested changes that felt right to me?

— Am I afraid of the response this story will receive, and am I just delaying sending it out?

— Is this story as good as I can make it right now?

If you answered “yes” to all those questions, you’ve got your answer.

Enough is enough. Trust your gut. Send that manuscript out before you overcook it. (After all, Rover won’t eat an overdone story.)

___________

Bruce Hale

Bruce Hale

About Bruce…
Bruce Hale began his career as a writer while living in Tokyo, and continued it when he moved to Hawaii in 1983. Before entering the world of children’s books, he worked as a magazine editor, surveyor, corporate lackey, gardener, actor, and deejay.

Bruce has written and illustrated over 25 books for kids. His Underwhere series includes Prince of Underwhere and Pirates of Underwhere. His Chet Gecko Mysteries series includes: The Chameleon Wore Chartreuse, The Big Nap, The Malted Falcon, Hiss Me Deadly, and others. More at http://www.brucehale.com/

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Monday (morning) writing joke: “Lionized”

A hungry African lion came across two men. One was sitting under a tree and reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.

Observation: Maybe that’s why Hemingway was never eaten on safari.The lions were more afraid of his typewriter than his rife.

Inverse observation: Even lions reject writers. Writers just aren’t a lion’s type.

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Photo finish Friday: “Nobody gnomes the trouble I’ve seen”

The rare albino gnome.

The rare albino gnome.

The rare albino gnome is not easy to capture on film (or digital), but these gnomes are on a quest to capture the pooka that turned them albino. They said the pooka did it on a dare from a puck. They did not think it was a hockey puck, but they weren’t 100 percent sure. After all, they have been on this quest for several centuries now, with little success in finding the pooka. And only the pooka that made them albino can turn them back. Because they have had no luck in finding the pooka, they are turning to you for help. Should you come across the pooka that turned these gnomes albino, please contact them. Leave a message under a rock by a stream running backwards under the light of a new moon on a Thursday. It is important you use this exact gnomeclature when contacting them. Otherwise, the message will be lost. Thank you for your help.

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Haiku to you Thursday: “Susurrate”

Brown leaves susurrate /

beneath the rake’s battered tines /

budding blossoms bared.

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Writing tip Wednesday: “To Indie or not to Indie publish”

Most Amazon bestselling authors aren’t making minimum wage

By Charlie Jane Anders

Yesterday we posted a chart from Hugh Howey’s new report on author earnings, showing indie and self-published authors pulling ahead of people published by the “big five” in terms of total unit sales. Now here’s another chart from an e-book publishing expert who’s calling some of Howey’s conclusions into question.

Chart:

E-book sales. Source: Hugh Howey

E-book sales. Source: Hugh Howey

Writing in Digital Book World, Dana Beth Weinberg points out that there are a number of questions about Howey’s data, even beyond the potential flaws that you’d already noticed. For one thing, Howey isn’t representing all self-published and indie authors — just the top 1.5 percent, or the cream of the crop. There are also some questionable assumptions in Howey’s methodology, writes Weinberg, and some statistical problems.

But leaving that stuff aside, even if you accept Howey’s data and his conclusions, it’s not clear that most of his indie/self-published authors are doing better than people published by the big mainstream publishers, argues Weinberg. What is clear, though, is that the people who are doing best, on Amazon e-book sales, are those published by Amazon’s own publishing imprints.

The really depressing thing? Weinberg estimates that most of the authors in the survey, whether self-published or published by a New York publishing house, are not making minimum wage:

Sales figures:

A different look at e-book sales.

A different look at e-book sales.

Full article at: http://io9.com/most-amazon-bestselling-authors-arent-making-minimum-w-1522482723

Source material at:
The Report, by Hugh Howey, Feb. 12, 2014
Full article at: http://authorearnings.com/the-report/

The Principal of Digital Abundance — thoughts on author earnings, by Damien G. Walter, Feb. 12, 2014
Full article at: http://damiengwalter.com/2014/02/12/the-principle-of-digital-abundance-thoughts-on-author-earnings/

Note: This post suggested by Research Assistant Ashlie

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cARtOONSDAY: “tRASH tALKIN'”

Willard the Writer had but one goal in life, and despite his wife's requests, then pleas, and finally order, it was not to take out the trash "Now!"

Willard the Writer had but one goal in life, and despite his wife’s requests, then pleas, and finally order, it was not to take out the trash “Now!”

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Monday morning writing joke: “blood money”

Q.: What did one English vampire writer say to another English vampire writer?

A.: “All this bloody writing is sucking the life out of me.”

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The blathering idiot and the sign

The blathering idiot was not sure what to make of the new rest room sign.

The blathering idiot was not sure what to make of the new rest room sign.

There had been complaints about how some of the blathering idiot’s co-workers had been mistreating the restroom facilities, so management had devised a new sign to help everyone understand. It was all in pictures in the hopes that there would be no confusion. Still, the blathering idiot had a few questions.

He understood that an “X” through the drawing meant do something or that is was wrong to do something. And from the new chart, he saw that it was okay to sit on the commode. Though all it looked the man was doing was sitting there and resting. His pants did not look pulled down and he was sitting too erect to be doing anything. A man needed to lean forward a little more when he pooped. And good luck if he tried to pee while sitting that way.

The second drawing puzzled the blathering idiot. Why would a man pour marbles into a commode?

Then there was the third drawing. Was that man praying?

As for the fourth drawing, he wondered why any man would try to ride a commode like a jockey. Had somebody at work really done that?

And then there was fishing in the commode. He had never thought of that. But certainly what was in there was not usually worth fishing for to begin with. Even he knew that. Unless, maybe, you accidentally dropped something in before doing anything else. What do yo do then? Call your supervisor?

As for the last drawing, it was the oddest of them all. It looked like a man squatting back from the commode and taking aim with an object or some sort, maybe even a child’s toy like a missile or torpedo, and trying to aim it at the commode. Did he mean to blow up the commode? Was he trying to throw into the commode something that he hadn’t been able to get to come out until he gave up sitting on the commode the way the man in the first drawing was? He did look a little like he was squatting, after all.

The blathering idiot pondered this poster until he couldn’t come up with any answers that made sense. He went to his supervisor for guidance, but all his boss would say is that it was being used in the Olympics and that if it was clear enough for them, it should be clear enough for everybody working for him.

The blathering idiot felt it was going to be a long shift.

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Experience Just How Big the Universe is, in One Mind-Blowing Interactive – PolicyMic

Experience Just How Big the Universe is, in One Mind-Blowing Interactive – PolicyMic.

Recently, NASA scientists combined data from the Spitzer and Hubble Space Telescopes to discover the most distant galaxy known to date. The galaxy, named Abell2744 Y1, was formed around 13.2 billion years ago when the universe was extremely young. As the universe is expanding, Abell2744 Y1 is currently closer to 40 billion light years away from us, an astounding distance.

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